Tuesday Gratitude

Yesterday I got a text from my daughter-in-love (who lives in the apartment downstairs) sweetly asking if I was up. When she awoke, several rooms downstairs were underwater. There’s nothing quite like starting the day with a flood! It’s a yucky, helpless feeling.

As a new female head of household, I find this especially stressful. I had to try to locate the source of the water and attempt to safely stop it, figure out who to call to resolve the leak and remove the water, while worrying about the financial impact and logistics of cleanup.

Today is a good day for a gratitude post.

Reminding myself of what’s going right is one of the quickest ways to shift my mood.

To clarify: I’m not a fan of toxic positivity. Healing from my past includes embracing all of my emotions. I don’t shame myself for so-called “negative” (no such thing) emotions. Still, being paralyzed (“freeze” is my typical trauma response) is unhelpful when I have urgent things to do.

So, doing a gratitude exercise is helpful to me to help me get unstuck.

I’m grateful for friends.

I’ve lost a lot of people in the past couple of years, and there’s a crap-ton of grief I’ve had to process.

But, I’ve made it a priority to reach out to people and not isolate myself. As a result, I have a very special new friend. And I’ve reconnected or nurtured relationships with older friends. I recently met a longtime online friend in person for the first time.

As they say, friends are the family you choose for yourself. And I’m so grateful for them!

I’m grateful for my emergency fund.

While I’ve made a lot of money mistakes, I’ve made some good decisions too. One of the good decisions is having financial margin, savings in the bank for emergencies. I’m hoping my homeowner’s insurance will cover the damage to my home, and the emergency fund means I’ll easily be able to cover the deductible without going into debt.

I’m grateful for relationships with my kids.

Six of my seven kids live on my property, and our relationships are happier than ever. My children give my life purpose. I don’t have the same existential struggles that many people who share my particular brand of trauma do.

Last weekend when my 22-year-old son drove me to the airport, he thanked me for “raising him right” and for “being an exceptional woman“. For that, I’m very grateful.

I’m grateful for COBRA.

Just one reason (of many) that I quit my job? I discovered that my health insurance “benefits” were not discounted. I’m paying the same amount to continue my coverage through COBRA.

I could write an entire post about how the American version of capitalism, which makes the USA a “developing first world country“, keeps people tied to horrible jobs and how insurance is a product, not a benefit, but I’ll instead link to people who already have. “The U.S. is also now considered a “flawed democracy,” according to The Economist’s democracy index.”

What are you grateful for today?